Age and Gender

Michael and I have gotten off to a late start. At 42 and 38, respectively, the choice to bring a child into this world has happened late in our reproductive career. We both had to meet someone we could imagine having a child with. Furthermore, it took us a while to find each other, and then it took us an appropriate amount of time to make sure that we were going to work out for the long haul. This seemed important.

We were incredibly lucky to be so fertile this late in the game. The method of conception that we used was very relaxed. It was the "Have-Sex-Everyday Method," and, for us, this worked; however, I don't ever take our situation for granted. I saw a woman on TV who makes realistic-looking newborn dolls because she had 7 miscarriages. So far, the fates have been kind to us, and I hope that they may continue to be so.

We didn't get the amniocentesis, so the fates have some wiggle room to screw with us. All of the screenings came out normal, which put the odds way in our favor of birthing a healthy baby. Apparently, though, at my "advanced age," the odds of some genetic misfortune are increased. I don't feel old, and I don't look old, but my eggs are as old as they are, and no amount of good skincare can make them seem any younger.

The choice not to get the amnio was affected by two things. My intuition, which said that Scooter is fine, and the doctor actually advised us against it. He said that the odds were so tilted in our favor of delivering a healthy baby that they far outweighed the amnio's odds. Apparently, the odds of a spontaneous miscarriage due to an amnio can be as bad as one out of two-hundred and fifty.

We're not sure of the gender. We chose not to find out, but our ignorance may have been thwarted by the ultrasound. We had to look, and we're pretty sure we saw "boy parts" on the fetus to suggest that Scooter is a boy. Also, my mother found out the gender from the ultrasound technician, and she keeps slipping on her pronoun usage when we discuss Scooter. There's a lot of, "He, uh, I mean she...," which is fine. I can't blame her, but we'll be pretty surprised to find out on Scooter's emergence that he is, in fact, a she. Also, and I know the experts say that you can't rely on such methods of gender prediction, I'm carrying like I swallowed a basketball.

So, we're old, but planning to do our best with Scooter, be the fetus a he or she. We have a cache of boy names with some girl names picked out, too, just in case. More on naming coming soon...